New Year's Resolutions

With the New year starting, it's a time to start looking at our live's and what we should be better at this year. It's a time to set goals. It's a time to evaluate our lives. Should we spend more time with our family than on technology? Should we be a better neighbor? Are we too mean to our friends? Do we do things we shouldn't? Are there talents we should develop? Do we spend too much time alone? Should we spend more time reading? Am I asking to many questions? Yes, yes I am.

So here are my suggestions for New Year's resolutions this year:

1. I will not eat a slug this year.

2. I will not bang my head on the wall for no reason.

3. I will not face palm every time I see someone doing something stupid. It's leaving a imprint of my hand on my forehead.

4. I will never chew on anyone.

5. I won't bathe in jello.

6. I won't put waffles in the DVD player.

7. I won't photocopy my butt and staple it to my boss's face.

8. I will check my food for anything living before I eat it. Then I'll eat it ether way.

9. I will not sing at the top of my lungs at the grocery store.

10. I will make more pizza.

Farewell, and may you not put a waffle in the DVD player.

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