Idioms

I'm still getting used to human speech. They often say one thing when they mean another. I believe this is called idioms. I'm still not used to them. Why just yesterday I was told to kill two birds with one stone, so I did. Actually, I just stunned them. Maybe that's why he was mad. I told him that my blaster would work much better. He got madder and screamed in my ear, "I like birds!!!" So I asked "If you like birds, why did you tell me to kill two? And why with a stone?" At that point, he threw a shoe at me, and stormed off. I just don't get idioms.

Someone told me that I have the best of both worlds. I didn't think he knew I was an alien. I disguise it well. I asked, "How did you know I was an Alien?" He then looked at me with a confused look on his face. "What are you talking about?" I then told him I'm from a distant planet called Grr-Awk. He then called me crazy and ran away.

I gave an inventor the blueprints for a hover board. About a week later, he told me that it didn't work. Apparently earth doesn't have Galivors. He asked me to go back to the drawing board, so I asked him what planet that was? I don't think he knew the coordinates; he just kept hitting himself on the head. After I realized it was an item. I looked for it for hours.

A man told me that I was barking up the wrong tree. I wasn't barking at a tree, but I wanted to see if I could bark up the right tree. I never found the right tree, but the police told me to go home.

I will continue talking about my problems with idioms tomorrow. Until then...

Farewell, and may you always find the right tree to bark up.