Birthdays

Earthlings have a weird holiday known as a birthday. What is the accomplishment of living one more year on earth? It's really not that hard. You don't have Slagsfut eating your house, Magmar setting you on fire, and you don't even have Lightning-bugs that shoot lightning. If we had birthdays on my planet, we would have the whole day to build robots. On earth, people celebrate their birthdays with parties. The party gets a theme, like unicorns, pirates, pirate unicorns, or pizza. Out of those choices, I'd get the pizza. Sometimes parents will rent out party places or giant inflatables, and spend a lot of money.

Then there are presents, because a giant inflatable, ice cream, cake, and friends aren't enough to celebrate surviving one more year. Presents can't be simple, like a ball, or some blocks. They have to be elaborate and expensive, like an iPhone for a eight-year old. I recently went to a two-year old's party, where they spent hundreds of dollars, rented a bouncy house, bought the kid a computer, and the kid cried through the whole thing. There's a book that illustrates this very well. It's called "Happy Birthday to You" by Dr. Seuss, a book about a bird giving a kid more presents than can fit in his house.

Farewell,  and may your birthdays always have great pizza.