Salesmen

A salesmen is someone who is paid to not take no for an answer. This can be as annoying as the two-year old saying why, why, why, why, why. There are different types of salesmen. When you go to the store and you're looking for a salesmen, there are none to be found, but when you don't want one around, they follow you around like hungry dogs, and to lose them you must run around the washing machine three times, slide under a bench, and hide in the refrigerator. Next time I go, I'll bring my pet RazorFang. That will keep unwanted salesmen away. Then there are car salesmen. When you drive into the parking lot, there is a line of salesmen ready to pounce. When they do, instead of showing you to a car you might like, they take you to their office, make you spend as much time there as they can, and get information about you so they can send you junk mail.

And then there are telemarketers. They're the salesmen that call you at the most inconvenient times, like at dinner, when your taking a bath, or cleaning up the toddlers art project. Yesterday, I had a conversation with a telemarketer, it went something like this.

TM "Knifeco has the sharpest knifes in the country."

ME  "Are they toddler proof?"

TM "Um no, but they'll cut through leather, a chicken bone, and ..."

ME "MEGAN, STOP CUTTING YOUR SISTERS HAIR! I'm not interested."

TM "Are you sure? We are having a sale. Buy four get one free."

ME "Great, all the kids can have one, and the dog to."

TM "So your interested?"

ME "NO!!!."

TM "So can we schedule a consultant to come to your house and show you our great knives? Does tomorrow work?"

ME "No, have him cum right now, he could help me clean up this mess, and I'm sure the toddlers would love to glue paper to his face. While I've got you here, I have a car for sale. Would you like to ..."

TM "Click"

Adios, and may salesmen never find you while you're hiding in the refrigerator.

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