School

On my planet, everyone is expected to be able to build a robot by the time he's twelve. In order to do this, our schools must teach math, science, and problem solving. We focus on academics, which is very different from schools on this planet, which focus more on self-esteem. Here two plus two can equal five if you feel good about it. A solution doesn't have to work, as long as people feel good about it. Success doesn't matter to earthlings as much as effort. On my planet if you don't succeed, you end up as a HongerBeast's lunch. Earth students rely heavily on technology and not on their brains. People think they are so smart because they can use technology, but so can a two year old, a monkey, or a sleep-walking porcupine.

Schools here don't focus on math, science, and literature. Instead they teach the four Cs, which are: critical thinking, communication, collaboration, and creativity; otherwise known as stuff that is so vaguely defined that it can mean anything you want. It's ok if your science project doesn't grow plants, but instead spits green acid and attracts killer bees. As long as you feel good about it and it doesn't look like a gun, you deserve that A.

Farewell, and may you always feel good while you're being devoured by a HongerBeast.