Gift Ideas

Buying gifts can be a difficult and stressful thing. People think that buying gifts for girls is simple because they can always buy chocolates, jewelry, or a pretty sweater. It's not that simple. Does the girl like dark chocolate or milk chocolate? Is she going to make assumptions about the relationship based off the jewelry? Be very wary about clothes. If a guy give a girl a sweater and it's the wrong size, then he's saying she's fat, or making her feel fat. If a guy doesn't spend enough  money on her, he's cheap, but if he spends too much money, he wasted it. Men aren't supposed to buy something practical for his girlfriend; that's not romantic enough. But if he buys some impractical, she will never use it. Food gifts are out, because she could be on a diet. Perfumes are out because she could be allergic. Bath salts are out because that indicates that she smells bad. Pretty much, everything is out, but you still have to buy a gift.

Guys are easy to find what they want, but not to afford. Men usually want expensive stuff, like guns or technology, or they have hobbies that are equally expensive. Bacon doesn't do well wrapped under a tree. 

Children are the easiest, as they have a list of what they want. The problem is that if you get them 350 toys, they will be upset that you didn't get them all 500. 320 will be broken by the end of the day.

Some people solve this problem by buying a gift card. That way they can look like they didn't put any thought in the present. Half the time it's to a store that the person doesn't like.

I have an excellent solution. Give your loved ones a robot butler. It's practical. It's cheap, and who doesn't like not having to do his chores? Wait! I've just been informed that robots are not cheap, and they do not exist on this planet.

Farewell, and may someone get you a maid for Christmas.

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